My Dearest;

It is so very important to know the degree of ones affection for you; so that you can know how much of your own self that you will allow to be invested. There is a scripture that I love, and it goes as such: “”Do not give to dogs what is sacred; and do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.(Matthew 7:6 NIV)“” In essence, what this verse is saying is: invest wisely and with great discernment.

There is nothing worse than investing your precious treasures into the wrong person, place, or thing. You and all things concerning you are precious. Therefore if you know and/or have a clue that where you are investing yourself into is not the most fulfilling of places – then gather yourself and leave peacefully. Hold on to what you have, and save it for where you will be cherished and appreciated. Do not invest yourself into someone and/or something that will: degrade, reject, oppress, suppress, repress, bankrupt, drain, undervalue, neglect, take advantage of, abuse, or worse – destroy you. Acknowledge the beauty, wonder, and sanctity of thyself. For you have every right to demand respect and honorable treatment.

So let us briefly try to go over three different types of relationship categories. They are: I Like You, I Love You, and I Respect You.

I Like You – This means that you are found to be quite amiable and kindly. Your gifts and contributions are much appreciated. The benefits that one receives from being connected to you are well received. Your friendship is welcome and in-turn reciprocated. And you enjoy each other’s company very much so! For your time together is filled with much laughter and fun. Oh what a delight! This is surely one acquaintance to be had! But….in this relationship…….you are only loved Conditionally. Therefore don’t get too comfortable here. For these acquaintances don’t last forever; and even if they do – it is with limited reciprocation. And if it is deemed that the grass is greener on the other side, then accept the fact that they will leave you. It’s not personal, it’s just the nature of things. Thus you must not look for a meal where you’re only being fed Hors d’ oeuvres. This is friendly acquaintanceship at its best.

I Love You – This relationship exemplifies all of the wonderful characteristics of true friendship. And in this relationship, you are loved Unconditionally. . . . Period. Thus through all that life may bring your way; though it may be the greatest of times or the worst of times, you have nothing to fear – for they will always be there. For this love is pure loyalty, dedication, and devotion. It is not selfish and self-seeking, but rather giving and self-sacrificing. This relationship stands the test of time; and it is a wonder in its own right. What a blessing it is to love and be loved in return.

William Shakespeare said it best:

Sonnet 116
“Love is not love 
Which alters when it alteration finds, 
Or bends with the remover to remove. 
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark 
That looks on tempests and is never shaken”

I Respect You – This surely is not Love. Nor is it friendly acquaintanceship. Although you may meet up for lunch, and share invigorating conversation over tea; a mutual bond is never really formed. Simply put, it is mutual respect amongst colleagues. It may feel like friendship at times, but you must not let your heart get carried away. Guard your heart at all costs. For even when wisdom is shared, advice is given, and knowledge is sought – you remain colleagues. And even after forces are joined and a goal is achieved; you go back to your own respective places, with a job well done. And life is lived on as you go your separate ways. Nothing is left, but a lesson well learned.

So ponder on this, and be very sure to put your relationships into perspective. For although these three relationships may resemble each other at times whilst confounding the emotions, they are surely different. Therefore you must allow thine own heart, spirit, and mind the opportunity to discern the difference. Allow wisdom and sound judgment to be your guide. For when you know the Facts, perhaps you won’t be like the fictional character Marianne, from Jane Austen’s Sense and Sensibility, crying: “Willoughby, Willoughby” – In The Pouring Rain. And also, you will have saved yourself a world of heartache.

 

Sincerely,

Krystal K.

 

Enjoy Barbara Streisand’s “People”, from the film Funny Girl

My Dearest;

Like a crisp glass of wine, dreams bring vivacity into our lives. It’s what encourages us to move forward; and it’s what cautions us to refrain from that which may hold us back. It pushes us to move beyond preconceived ideas; as well as gives us the courage to fight back against the vast armies of doubt and fear. The pursuit of one’s dreams allows you to create a destiny free of any limitations. And it strengthens you to bust through doors, and tear down walls to all the places where it is said that you: could not, should not, and cannot go.

It is true; your life will go in the direction of your thoughts. Thus when you put your feet to your faith; your life will go in the direction of your dreams. Now listen dear Hare, the race is not given to the quick – but to those who persevere. Therefore hold fast dear Tortoise; dare not give up. Put your foot to the petal, and like Dr. Seuss said: “Oh The Places You’ll Go”.

You must know my friend, that our dreams produce the very courage needed to take the road less traveled by. And it is the gusto that breaths great passion into our lives. Oh yes, dreams really do come true. But a dream deferred makes the heart sick. And a life without dreams becomes void of fervor and purpose. Langston Hughes said it best:

“Dreams”, by Langston Hughes

Hold fast to dreams

For if dreams die

Life is a broken-winged bird

That cannot fly.

Hold fast to dreams

For when dreams go

Life is a barren field

Frozen with snow.

So hold fast to your dreams, for you are more than a conqueror. And if I may say, but in the words of Dr. Seuss, a man who also said it best: “Congratulations! Today is your day. You’re off to Great Places. You’re off and away!” ― Dr. Seuss, Oh, The Places You’ll Go!  

 

Sincerely,

Krystal K.

 

Enjoy “A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes”, from Disney’s Cinderella  

 My Dearest;

To be humble and kind, are amongst some of the greatest attributes that we could ever possess. So let us strive to be and do our very best.

Enjoy this poem by W. Lomax Childress.

 

Most Sincerely,

Krystal K.

 

Let Us Be Kind, by W. Lomax Childress

Let us be kind;
The way is long and lonely,
And human hearts are asking for this blessing only—
That we be kind.
We cannot know the grief that men may borrow,
We cannot see the souls storm-swept by sorrow,
But love can shine upon the way to-day, to-morrow—
Let us be kind.

Let us be kind;
This is a wealth that has no measure,
This is of Heaven and earth the highest treasure—
Let us be kind.
A tender word, a smile of love in meeting,
A song of hope and victory to those retreating,
A glimpse of God and brotherhood while life is fleeting—
Let us be kind.

Let us be kind;
Around the world the tears of time are falling,
And for the loved and lost these human hearts are calling—
Let us be kind.
To age and youth let gracious words be spoken;
Upon the wheel of pain so many lives are broken,
We live in vain who give no tender token—
Let us be kind.

Let us be kind;
The sunset tints will soon be in the west,
Too late the flowers are laid then on the quiet breast—
Let us be kind.
And when the angel guides have sought and found us,
Their hands shall link the broken ties of earth that bound us,
And Heaven and home shall brighten all around us—
Let us be kind.

 

Enjoy listening to Humble and Kind, by Tim McGraw (You will be redirected to You Tube)

 

My Dearest;

It is often said, that a mind is a terrible thing to waste, which is true. But if I may push the envelope a little further; I would also tell you that in someone else’s hand, a mind is a terrible thing to behold. Why? Simply because if you are able to control the mind, then you control: the heart, the will, the emotions and decisions – you control the entire terrain. Thus you have in your very hands the power to create a world where the subject and all that pertains to it is under your complete rule. And regardless of anyone who tries to stake their claim or reclaim that which was lost, you remain in power. . . . . . . . Oh yes, it is very much indeed a game of thrones.

Furthermore, if someone is able to control your mind, then they have the power to inflict upon you mental torment and emotional anguish in the cruelest way. Fears come alive in the most dreadful way when someone controls your mind. Reality is distorted when someone controls your mind. The truth is heavily veiled when someone controls your mind. Your decisions are not your own when someone controls your mind. And your body is no longer your temple when someone controls your mind. Therefore, we can successfully conclude – that you are in the greatest danger of your life when someone controls your mind.

Now, in this “game”, there are many different doorways that lead to manipulation. There is the emotional and mental turmoil, which is often coupled with anger and fear. There is the vulnerable mind which gives way to false imaginations and a distorted view of reality. There is the weakened heart, plagued with loneliness; that often triggers poor decision making and a gravitational pull towards poisonous attachments. And there is the broken spirit, sickened with insecurity and a lack of self worth. All of these vulnerable places in your life provides one the access needed to come in and manipulate you. And like any coup, they will hostilely invade your territory and begin to systematically break all systems down. It is a slow yet steady process, with the aim of one day assuming complete control.

Think of a country that is living their days in peace and prosperity. All of a sudden, a rebel group – gluttonous for power, finds a flaw in their defenses and invades a coastal region to the north. The remaining regions of that country are still functioning well, as they have not yet felt the waves of the coup. But over time, as the rebels drive further south – the waves of the invasion are felt all over. However by this time it is too late to stop them – for they have gained way to much ground. At this point it would take a strong, strategically proficient, and tactical military with great heart and might to drive them out. And this would most likely take some time. Yet, this would not be necessary if their borders had been efficiently patrolled and secured from the start. Therefore just as ones country is worth securing and protecting; so is your: mind, body, heart, soul, and spirit. You are worth surveying, you are worth your own investment; and as long as you can help it – you are worth protecting. You’re too valuable to loose.

Here is something to ponder. You can dismiss a hater and you can confront a bully. You can refute false accusations and silence a liar. You can even fend off a thief and conquer your enemy. But when someone or something has possession over your mind, the great contender becomes – the surrendered. And suddenly you begin to realize that all of your defenses are down – for you have been paralyzed. Most importantly, you have been paralyzed by fear. Be sure to realize that the former represents a victors strength; yet the latter reveals a victims helplessness. Thus, if someone is trying very hard to manipulate you – could it be possible that you are worth far more than you’re able to comprehend? Could it be, that there is so much more to you than what meets the eye?

So then who will you become? Will you rise to become the Great Contender; or will you kneel to become The Surrendered? Only one can sit at the throne……

 

The Art of Manipulation Part III Will Return Soon

 

Enjoy “Song of The Lonely Mountain” by Neil Finn, from The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

 

 

My Dearest;

I would like to talk to you about manipulation. Manipulate, according to Dictionary.com, is defined as: “to manage or influence skillfully, especially in an unfair manner”; and “to adapt or change to suit one’s purpose or advantage”.

In life we all face something that I consider to be “The Great Manipulator”. So what is “The Great Manipulator” you may ask? Could it be: doubt, fear, rage, insecurity, depression, jealousy, or unbelief? I would say that it’s all of the above. Why? Simply because all of these emotions skillfully influence your actions; and they tend to manage your mental state – often to the point of utter dysfunction. Emotions can govern the mind, thus if you do not have your emotions under control – they will control you and influence all that you do.

 

Allow me to share one example. Once there lived woman who loved to care for wild animals. They often roamed onto her property in search for food, as she fed them quite regularly. One day a large and aggressive male bear (known as The Bear) happened across her property, and began to taunt a more vulnerable baby bear. The old woman feeling her motherly instincts begin to rise up in her; ran out onto the back porch to defend the baby bear and scare The Bear away. The Bear eventually walked away. A short time later when the animals were once more feeding on her property, The Bear happened across her property once again and began the taunt the baby bear. Feeling that she needed to protect it; the woman again ran out to defend her cub. But this time – The Bear was waiting. As she ran out and began to defend the baby bear, The Bear slashed at her through her several foot high metal fence. She then fell to the ground, and seizing his opportunity – The Bear closed in on his prey. The Bear snatched her from underneath her gate, and then dragged her body into the woods. There he killed, there she died. When the troopers and paramedics arrived on the scene some time later, they discovered the horrific scene. And when they followed the trail into the woods, they found the woman’s lifeless body on the ground. But, they also encountered the predator who indeed took her out. He was guarding her body as a prize; it was his token. The Bear was so possessive and aggressive, that they had to kill him in order to carry her body away.

 

Let us think this over. The kind woman often feed animals on her property. This means that the animals were indeed familiar with the land. The Bear wondered onto her land and began to taunt the baby bear, and she ran out to defend it. The Bear then walked off to only return several days later to kill her. Could it be that if the other animals were familiar with her land, then the bear was too? The Bear was obviously strong, aggressive and possessive. Thus if the bear wanted to really harm the baby bear, he would have. Therefore could it be that the real target was the woman all along? And if this was the case, then The Bear might have been watching and hunting her for quite some time. The woman had a large fence in front of her back porch that was meant to protect her from any harm or dangers. The Bear therefore could have been wondering as to how he would get past her defenses to get his prey. And from way The Bear guarded her lifeless body, he wanted her badly.

We all often underestimate the minds of animals, for they are smarter than we all think. This particular bear was very strategic, and he was extremely cunning. Whenever you are hunting, one key is watchful waiting. You must wait for an opportunity for your prey to reveal itself, and any potential weakness. You also must study your prey and their movements. Another key is to drive out your prey, and getting them right where you want them.

 

So what happened? Well, the bear set a trap – and he skillfully did so. Time had shown that by taunting the baby bear, The Bear would get her attention. So it set out to toy with the baby bear knowing that it would cause her to come out. And when she did, the bear could have his desired kill – her. So how did The Bear do this? The Bear succeeded in his hunt by simply preying on her emotions, and then controlling her actions by manipulating her. He used her own emotions against her. The Bear knew that the woman wanted to protect her cub. Therefore the bear achieved his means by skillfully and strategically managing the entire situation by way of deceit. Now, if a bear can manipulate a person to the point of death – how much more can we, as humans, manipulate each other? I say this not to make you paranoid; but more so it is a challenge to allow yourself to become more discerning. You have instincts my dearest; trust them – use them.

So, let me ask you, who is The Bear in your life?

 

 The Art of Manipulation – Part II resumes next week.

 

Watch this clip from Disney Pixar’s “BRAVE”

 

My Dearest;

Many of us were expected, and many of us were a surprise. However many of us were completely unexpected. We were considered a mistake, and in that regard we shouldn’t even be alive. Nevertheless, nine months in the womb, a few hours (or days) of intense labour to say the least – and here we are. We are precious little babes born with our own unique personalities. And whether those who have peopled our youth realize it or not; we are something quite beautiful to behold. We are individuals with our own proclivities; blossoming as we learn and grow in and through life. Thus from nature to nurture, and love to faith; our ways are established, and we develop in our own different way.

Character begins to form, and with that specific preferences and ideals. Dreams also begin to form, and with that comes great aspirations. So from our youth to adulthood: we are ever learning, we are ever growing, and we are always overcoming. We are simply finding our way, as we progressively discover who we really are. And that is something that we all never really stop doing, for we are constantly evolving. Thus from one phase to another, we are always in transition.

Why am I saying all of this you may ask, what is my point? I share all of this to simply say – that you are extraordinary. You are unique, you are beautiful, you are a masterpiece; and you have a purpose. Even more so, just as no fingerprints are alike – you can rest assured that none of us are the same. You are simply one of a kind. Indeed we are works in progress, but we are works of art. A canvas that never ceases to amaze as time reveals its true Beauty. Therefore it matters not how you came into this world, but what matters is how you go out – your legacy.

So whether you are: quirky, goofy, shy, outgoing, or adventurous. Whether you are a: conservative, liberal, moderate, nerd, or hipster. Whether you were: planned, unexpected, or discarded. And whether you are: classically urbane, gracefully dictative, vibrantly urban, or anywhere in between – you are you. And you are Wonderful!! Therefore celebrate the great in you, improve the good, and challenge the bad. Work on yourself and strive to improve your ways. A great family name, money, or your talent may afford you your dreams. But it is your character that will keep you there. So admit to your flaws, set out to change them – and then continue to change, learn, and grow. Continue to beautifully evolve. They say that life has a way of changing us, yes? But if and as we change, let us try to change for the better.

Therefore stand firmly in the authority and affirmation of yourself, and celebrate you – for you are loved. Allow no one to change you into who they want you to be, and discard anything that degrades you. For that is your mind, your body, your soul, and your spirit. That is your future. Therefore guard and protect your treasures to the best of your ability. And guard and protect the very essence of you at all costs. Chase after your dreams and fulfill your purpose in this world. Give this life of yours everything that you have got; and do it all by being courageous, good, benevolent, and true. But never forget to do it all while being YOU. Thus when you have spoken your last line, when you have danced your last dance, and have sung your last song; you can say with deep conviction – that you have done it all. And that you have done it Your Way.

Sincerely,

Krystal K.

 

Enjoy listening to “My Way” by the late, the great – Frank Sinatra

 

 

My Dearest;

We all have dreams and goals that we desire to become a reality. But if we can be honest with ourselves, sometimes life just makes it hard for us to believe that anything good could ever happen in our lives. So whatever it is that you are believing for; whether it be a: dream, goal, house, new car, job, healthy life/body, or whatever it is that it may be for you – keep believing. Try to maintain a positive attitude and a level of expectancy each day. And when you’re feeling down, acknowledge your emotions – and then begin to pick yourself back up again to continue the race.

Celebrate your identity by being authentically you; with your dream being conceived out of your own heart, and not someone else’s idea of you. Also try to keep an actual image of your dream before you to drive you and feed your faith. It can be a: picture, phrase, scripture, or even a special little object which symbolizes something only you can understand. In this way, you also protect your dream; something that is very important as you move forward into your destiny. Everyone cannot know your dream, and sometimes discretion is wise.

Be sure to surround yourself with people that love, support, and care for you unconditionally. And if that is not possible, believe in and support yourself; for you are certainly worth your own investment. Always remember that you can do great things when you put your mind (imagination) towards it. Know that you are never really alone. And know that at any moment your life can change, and that you could be walking in your destiny. Therefore have enough courage to believe in the impossible, and always believe in you.

So never give up, for time and chance happen to us all. And never cease to keep pushing forward. For to push, is to fight. Thus fight against your doubts, anxiety, worries, and fears. Fight against your own perception of yourself, for we can be our own worst enemy at times. And fight against anyone’s preconceived ideas of: who you are, what you can do, and what you can become. But fight for you and fight for your future. Fight on – Dream on – Live on.

Sincerely,

Krystal K.

Enjoy Listening to “Rise Up”, by Andra Day

 

Dear Guests;

Welcome to my blog: Letters of Kind Persuasion. This page has been created with you in mind. I am therefore delighted that you have decided to visit my page, and I hope that it will help you in many ways.

The purpose of this blog is to provide encouragement and advice to any person that may be in need of it. It is therefore my intention to post kindhearted letters that will focus on a specific theme. And at the end of each letter there will be a song attached to tie in with the theme of that day.

Please know that I am in no way or form a licensed: counselor, therapist, or Doctor of any sort. But I am someone who hopes to help give you that nudge to keep moving forward. So have a seat while cozying up with a wonderful cup of tea, or a glass of wine, and enjoy the blog.

Thank you again, and have a great week ahead of you.

Most Sincerely,

Krystal K.